Remembering...

I have wanted to sit down and write this post for 2 days but I didn't have a second to myself (which I think was a good thing). On October 30, 2008 I went into labor and I staying in labor for 3 weeks. I remember that day as clearly as if it was yesterday and in many ways to me it feels like it was only yesterday. I was 33 weeks pregnant and enjoying my day. I picked up Ash from kindergarten and started having contractions. I came home and laid down, drank some water, but they were getting closer together so Dave and I shuffled the kids to our emergency people, called my parents to come get them and went to the hospital. If you had told me then that I would have to stay there I would have laughed in your face. I figured we would go in, get a shot, maybe be admitted for a day and go back to my life until Lexi was ready to come out. Soooo not what happened.

I did go in and get the shot, many of them but the contractions were still there pretty hard but not painful and they were not stopping. I remember the nurse telling me they were going to put me on MAG and that I would want to die for 3 days and then I would feel better. Dave asked how long I would have to stay and she said "you may be here for 2 weeks" and we chuckled.

They started the MAG and they have to get you in a "theraputic" and yet not "toxic" range. First bolus put me in the "toxic" range. Oh yeah did I mention it makes you REALLY HOT (I still think I am recovering from this). I could not lift my head because it makes you really dizzy, I felt like my skin was being burned off (which it was from the heat coming out of my pores) I could barely function and I honestly don't remember much from those 3 days. I was violently ill and scared that any sudden movement would cause my water to break. The weird part is that I was never worried about Lexi. I knew that she was fine because I had daily ultrasounds for the next 2 weeks during my stay. I had really great nurses who always tried to talk with me and would let me know my options (although leaving was never one of them). I had contractions for the next 2 weeks at least 12-15 maybe more an hour but my body didn't feel them. I was on an antibiotic which apparently I was allergic too which no one figured out until I went into labor. I stayed on the dreaded MAG for those 2 weeks. My body was HOT but they kept my room at about 50 degrees. People would visit me in parkas and I would sit there in my gown and no blankets.

AND I CHANGED

it is really hard to explain how. I felt guilty for not being home with my kids and husband. I think that was the worst part of the whole ordeal was that I was stuck there. I often said it felt like prison to me because I could not leave. It was probably the hardest thing I have ever had to go through and I was lucky. My Lexi was healthy. She was active and growing and when she graced us with her presence at exactly 36 weeks she was gorgeous.

and look where we are today...

I am thankful for her and I am still a different person than I was on October 30, 2008. A friend told me that there are scars and there are but what a great prize right?

Oh and one of me and the brood :)

Happy Running!!